One or two days late is not even a thing. Doesn’t need to be mentioned.

Three days late is still fine, no biggie.

Four days starts feeling a bit puzzled.

Five days the period is still not here. That’s strange. Should I be concerned? I’m looking at my app to see. When did we have sex exactly? Did we take extra caution on the riskiest days and did we pay full attention? Is there reason to be worried?…

Sixth day. Period still late. Starting to think pregnancy thoughts. Can it be? No way. But I was a bit nauseated a morning or two lately… And do my breasts feel tender because I am about to have my period or because I am pregnant? Maybe I need to get a pregnancy test. I mean, the chances are slim. Very slim. We are always careful. And still. No protection is 100% full-proof. Is there a chance I might be pregnant? My period normally is a very accurate 30-days cycle. Perhaps this is the start of being perimenopausal?

Seventh day. I am not worried. But starting to imagine what would happen if I am pregnant. Should I be happy about it? Or should I un-pregnant? OK. It’s time to take that pregnancy test just to get my mind to shut up. Oh wait, I needed to pee on the stick while it’s facing down? Phew, it says I’m not pregnant. But actually – the indicator window says the test was done incorrectly… Oh bummer, I’ll need to that again. But do I feel menstrual cramps? I’ll wait one more day for the bleeding to start and then I’ll do it again.

Day 8. Period is now an entire week late. That’s not on. I definitely need another pregnancy check. And what do I do if I am pregnant? This starts feeling real. Do I want to have another child? Do I want to have another child with my current partner? I don’t think we’ll be able to live at the same household together – we’ll drive each other nuts. Should we even be together at all? I don’t even know… Help!

The aftermath.

Finally! The evening of the 8th day. Bleeding starts to happen. It’s a relief. The last few days have made me face some questions I’d rather put a side again. I don’t want to make a decision about my current relationship just yet. I’m OK with letting it linger a bit longer without knowing if we are supposed to take it to the next level. Whatever that level might be.

On contraceptives.

I shared an article once about my personal bad experience with the pill. At the end of that article, I concluded I wouldn’t recommend the use of hormonal contraceptives. They messed my body too much. Now, with my current partner, we are mainly using the withdrawal method, coupling it with knowing where I am on my cycle (which is done with the help of an app that tracks my menstruation). I know, right? You probably think these are so outdated, unsafe methods to avoid pregnancy. And in all honesty, I would not recommend these to most people. Using the withdrawal method correctly requires body awareness, skill, and a strong sense of responsibility from your partner. Much more than any other contraceptive. Which is why I don’t recommend it generally.

The only reason I mention it here is because I think you should choose the contraceptive that works best for your personal needs and for your relationship’s needs. Do the research. And make an informed decision, for crying out loud. Don’t trust me. Or your best friend. Or your doctor, for that matter. Trust your research capabilities coupled with your logic. We live in the internet age, people.

Perimenopause.

Menopause doesn’t happen in a day (one month you get your period, then the next month it doesn’t come). Nope, it is a process. This process is quite individual and varies from one woman to the next. In can last a few months or a few years. But what you’ll see is that your cycle starts to behave differently. In my case, where my cycle is almost spot on 30 days (sometimes 28 or 29), being 7 days late is a good indicator that something is shifting. It could be a one-off oddity, who knows? Or it could be the beginning of a process that signals the start of the end. The end of my fertility. I don’t know how I feel about this one yet. Only time will tell…