When I’m super tired, it’s easier for me to orgasm.


My eyes are closed. I’m enjoying some special touch from my partner. It feels so beautiful and I’m flying into the clouds and landing on the soft ground, surrounded by brown autumn leaves.

A fraction of a second later and I’m back to reality. Oh, I’m having sex, am I? A few pleasurable moments and now I am on a busy street and people are rushing past me, hurrying while I stand there taking notice but maintaining a calm state of being.

Oops, actually I’m in our bed. With my man. Having sex. It feels so delicious… Where am I exactly?

Ah yes OK OK OK here it comes. A sweet wave taking over me oh so gently and carries me with it back to dreamland.

Not your mind-blowing, earth-shaking, glorious crescendo that people usually anticipate of sex. Rather a shy, tender, simply pleasant orgasm.


Many women, yours truly included, find it easier to orgasm when having solo sex than when having partnered sex.

Without getting into the reasons for the orgasm gap, different women utilize various techniques to maximize their chances for orgasm with a male partner.

The common denominator of these techniques is that they override our tendency for thinking while having sex. When our mind is still and calm, it’s much easier to fully enjoy sex. Letting go in bed comes naturally.

An example that I’m sure you’re familiar with is alcohol. I’m not referring here to getting completely drunk. More like a glass or two of the favorite red/white to get into that slightly more peaceful zone of brain activity, that’s all.

Personally, I don’t like drinking. I just never got accustomed to the taste of alcohol. And I think my sleepiness would generally have a similar effect.

My brain goes to la-la land and my body gets so relaxed…

Needless to say, this can only happen with a man whom I know extremely well and I can trust to the Nth degree. Otherwise, the hormones that make sure to keep me on my toes come to play and they will never allow for a sleepy me to come about.


Usually, I’m wide awake when having sex. Even if I’m tired, I would normally spring back to alertness mode. I love being an active participant while making love. 

It is a rare occasion for me to have sex and stay sleepy. But when it does happen, and my loving partner is enjoying my body with the utmost care and with pleasant attention, I drift off. Only to find out that an orgasm surfaced without even being called for. Not by me, not by my partner. Simply washed over me ever-so-gently.

These sleepy orgasms are not strong or exciting. But their tenderness lingers, providing unprecedented nourishment for my body, mind, and soul. And they are my favorite orgasms by far.

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